So, how come when we discuss sleep we assume that leaving a young child in a cot, alone, will somehow help them learn to go to sleep?
I send my daughter to school. She goes there to learn and of course she has a teacher; someone who has been educated to provide my child with knowledge and is able to guide her through the educational system.
I can’t imagine my daughter ever bringing home a letter stating: “Today we practiced math. The children were struggling to understand some of the calculations so to make sure I really taught them how to work them out, I locked them in the classroom and left them to sort it out for themselves. After all, they need to know who the boss is and math is a very important life skill”
It just wouldn’t happen.
So, how come when we discuss sleep we assume that leaving a young child in a cot, alone, will somehow help them learn to go to sleep? We don’t perform any other kind of “teaching” in this way, without support, so why is this considered a valid teaching method?
Are we sure that they actually fall asleep feeling happy and peaceful, or are they in fact feeling worried and stressed but have understood that crying is pointless. No one will come anyway.
During the toddler years there is a huge amount of development going on, the entire brain rewires and there is a crazy amount of new connections made every day.
Combine this with a rapidly growing body and the molars arriving, toddlerhood can make it almost impossible for some children to relax and fall asleep.
Your toddler may need that reassurance, comfort and parental support for a little while longer; and considering the big picture does that really have a negative impact on your life?
Your toddler may need that reassurance, comfort and parental support for a little while longer; and considering the big picture does that really have a negative impact on your life?
We live in a world where more and more adults are feeling stressed and anxious. Where the pressures of life are constant.
A toddler will feel these emotions too.
As an adult, if you’re finding sleep difficult, you can speak to medical professionals and therapists.
You can meditate, take part of relaxation exercises and feel supported in ways to learn how to try and resolve outside stressors enough for a positive sleeping experience.
If these exercises do not work there are herbal aids and even pharmaceutical medicines, all there to help us sleep!
Isn’t it quite baffling that as adults with complete brain development and fully developed communication skills, we have the right to receive support with sleep that a brand new little human doesn’t? A generation of sleep trained adults yet we still have trouble “self soothing”!
Sometimes I do wonder, if we had instead normalised the idea of offering children sleep support via methods of relaxation rather than leaving them to cry; would there be less adults in the world still finding it difficult to enter dream land?
teach
tiːtʃ/
verb
1.1.
impart knowledge to or instruct (someone) as to how to do something.
(Oxford dictionary)
Sofie Thomson is a writer, breastfeeding advocate and (breastfeeding) peer supporter from Sweden, now living in the Scottish Highlands with her husband and children. Since completing her degree in Child and Youth Studies, she has focused on encouraging parents to follow biological norms and trust their natural parenting instincts via her blog – The Gentle Mum. You can also follow her on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
