By Hannah Schenker
Do you have a turbulent teen in your family? Distracted, risk-seeking and overly connected to the online world (exposing them to risks of cyber bullying, porn and gaming addictions)? Teens seem to be increasingly attached to one another and less and less attached to us – despite our best efforts to engage them. So how are we supposed to keep them safe from harm? Adrienne Wood of HeartSync brings a fresh approach to navigating Teen Turbulence and is offering a series of presentations to Auckland parents, from 18-20 June.
You may have been on your gentle parenting journey since your child was young, and now you’ve hit the turbulent teens – how should you approach this stage of your child’s life? Not many parents of older children have a place to look for a less behaviourist (consequences and rewards) type approach to tricky behaviour and broken relationships.
“Conventional forms of parenting rely on tools such rewards and consequences,” Adrienne says. “While these strategies work quite nicely with most children, they are least likely to work with children who have the most behavioural needs. These children need a gentler touch and a deeper understanding of the dynamics that underpin their behaviour.”
Using the attachment-based developmental theory of Canadian psychologist Gordon Neufeld, Adrienne helps parents and professionals find psychological insight into the adult-teen dynamic.
“Parents pull back from their children as they grow older hoping they will begin to self-manage or thinking they’re not needed by them anymore,” Adrienne says. “For sensitive children who feel things more deeply, under the surface this feels a bit like rejection. So, they begin to act out and pretend they ‘don’t need adults in their life anyway’. It makes parenting teens a lot trickier until this is set right.”
From 18-20 June, Adrienne is offering three presentations in North, Central and South Auckland. While targeted at teens, parents of children aged 8 years and older will find this information extremely useful, in preparation for those years ahead when your children still need you, but in a very different way.
You will discover:
- Common factors that trigger Teen Turbulence and put our youth at risk of harm
- How Neufeld theory provides an alternative approach with adolescents
- The concept of “shielding” and how we as adults can protect teens from the full impact of the turbulent events in their lives with a gentler approach.
Are you interested in finding a new way to parent you Turbulent Teen?
North: Monday June 18th 7 – 9pm, Brian Gerrard Theatre.
South: Tuesday June 19th 7 – 9pm, Faith City Church.
Central: Wednesday June 20th 7 – 9pm, Dorothy Winstone Centre.
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Drawing on her experience as both a high school teacher and lecturer in human development and on her training with the Neufeld Institute where she is now Acting Regional Director for New Zealand, Adrienne Wood seeks to help parents and professionals better understand youth from an attachment-based developmental perspective. She has a particular interest in children presenting with complex behavioural needs. She offers a range of courses, as well as working one-on-one with parents.