So, if sleep is the same, what can I do to move myself through that intense survival mode? Get support around me, reduce my mental load, increase my self-care and learn about what’s going on for my son at this age so that I know what’s normal and how I can best support him. And therapy, because there is always healing to be done.
I am in no way denying that you’re tired. I know you’re exhausted.
Normal baby sleep can’t be fixed, because it’s not broken.
I absolutely believe that it’s important to understand normal baby and toddler sleep so that we can optimise it and make it less of a battle ground, and then work on maximising the rest that we can get. But once we’ve done that, we do have to wait for developmental readiness before our kids will sleep longer and need us less – we can’t force them into that earlier than they’re ready (and remembering that all babies are different!). And I believe that even if your little one starts consistently sleeping through the night, if you’re not addressing all of the other pieces of the puzzle to your wellness, you’re still going to be exhausted and overwhelmed.
Normal baby sleep can’t be fixed, because it’s not broken.
Mothers trying to cope with a load that far exceeds what they’re meant to carry – that’s a system that’s broken. And unfortunately it falls on the mother herself to try and fix, because our society doesn’t support her to do it.
Which is why I’m so passionate about the work I do – because our little ones are not broken, and neither are we – but we need support to try and cultivate a new system that works for us and where we’re at right now.
Originally published here.
Sarah is your Baby Sleep Tour Guide – supporting you to understand biologically normal infant sleep, with an attachment focus, so that you can optimise sleep and accept your little one’s normal patterns & needs. She is passionate about challenging the mainstream narratives of baby & toddler sleep, and of motherhood – empowering mums to make choices aligned with their values of responsive gentle parenting, but without the self-sacrifice. Sarah is an Aussie mum and offers private sleep consults as well as a small group motherhood support program – you can find her on Instagram @blossomandsnooze and her website www.blossomandsnooze.com.
