I sat on 32 unforgettable chairs over 32 days in NICU. 32 days of listening to stories and watching them happen in front of me. The most common, everyday story was seeing other families go home from NICU. It was a bittersweet feeling. You’re observing from afar, happy that they’re able to leave the noise, the machines and the sadness, yet feeling so envious that it’s not your turn. There were days that I would wake up and say “This will be our last day in the hospital,” then come home feeling sad.
No NICU graduate mum would ever forget the endless pumping on those unforgettable chairs, just to make sure that the wee one has something to eat through the tube.
No one could blame you if you got SO super excited to dress up your baby after the doctors said he can finally come out from the incubator. Not all parents celebrate “FIRST DAY BEING WIRE-FREE”.
This is not what most parents dreamed of, especially when it’s their first time as parents. But we did experience this. And it was an overwhelming experience that we are proud of, because every time we look back at those memories, it reminds us how it shaped us as parents and every time we look at our little fighter, it reminds us that miracles do exist.
Please don’t get me wrong. NICU comes with amazing things too. NICU is a safe place. A place where real angels, in the form of doctors and nurses, work for our little ones. A place of hope and love. A place where our wee man first met friends.
Sometimes it’s important to look back at life to be grateful of where we are now.
Francoise Voldoire and her husband moved to New Zealand in 2015 and now call Christchurch home. She is a theatre nurse by profession and an adventurer for life! She believes in the beauty of writing and photography as it holds memories. She finds her happiness in travelling, food and the great outdoors. After giving birth to her firstborn, she found her new simple pleasure of being a mother. You can follow her on Instagram.
