Here we are now and he’s almost two and a half. I can safely say I am a proud bed-sharing mamma. And I get to wake up to his face.
As for his cot, it’s been put to good use, our fancy laundry basket.
My experience highlights the lack of accurate information given to expectant and new mums.
The importance of the fourth trimester, the research backing it, it just gets drowned in our commercialised society.
Like the fact that human babies are born before their systems get a chance to mature. That they need their nine months of ‘exterogestation’ or gestation outside the womb.
Or the fact that being in contact with the mother’s body, the infant’s systems is regulated.
It is possible to safely bed-share. It is in fact recommended that an infant sleep around a responsible adult.
Although I know so much better now and if we have another baby they’ll be bed-sharing from day one, there will always be some mamma guilt about making my tiny newborn sleep on his own in the cot.
Imagine antenatal classes and Plunket told you this instead of the co-sleeping scare mongering spiel that they spew.
Imagine if all new mums brought their children into the world armed with this knowledge, what a revolution that would be.
Dilshad is the mum behind The Gentle Mamma. She enjoys being a stay at home mum. Her little family includes her exuberant two-and-a-half-year-old toddler Zaryush and her husband Percy. They are based in Auckland and enjoy beach days in the summer, basking in the winter sun and snuggles all year long. She is an avid reader and a huge Harry Potter fan. She is a passionate advocate of gentle responsive parenting. This cause has long been close to her heart but it was the birth of her son that motivated her to further it.
In March 2017 she made the decision to share their journey into gentle parenting on social media. Having a public platform to share the things that she learns as they navigate their way through parenthood has been quite the experience. She documents their personal victories and struggles out in the open keeping it real and honest. Being able to spread awareness about non-punitive methods of parenting, reaching people all over the world and being able to offer that solidarity has been invaluable and humbling. It has also been a constant journey of educating herself, which has recently brought her to the realisation that her quest for a gentle lifestyle is incomplete without sustainability. In hopes of leaving our children a thriving planet, they are taking slow but steady steps to make changes in their lives and their household. She is grateful for the opportunity to connect with so many great minds and beautiful hearts.