By Nicole Lloyd
Most women will have at least one loved one attend her labour, whether in hospital or at home. Usually the husband/partner will be there, mother, sister or best friend, and sometimes the siblings in a home birth situation.
All of your loved ones LOVE you and no one enjoys seeing a loved one experiencing pain. Also, none of them have probably ever seen or heard you experience pain for what could be for several hours… Maybe they have seen/heard you swear your head off for a few minutes after you’ve stubbed your toe, or maybe you have groaned and moaned when sick with the flu, or maybe they have seen you scream and cry if you have ever broken a bone … BUT the sounds of labour are going to be very, very different and will most likely go on for a much longer period of time … becoming more and more intense as the labour progresses.
All of your loved ones LOVE you and no one enjoys seeing a loved one experiencing pain. Also, none of them have probably ever seen or heard you experience pain for what could be for several hours.
From the reading I have done and from my own personal experience, making primal sounds during contractions whether that is moaning, groaning, toning or a combination of the lot, will assist with pain relief, relaxing and opening the cervix, activate the parasympathetic nervous system and keep the labouring woman in “the zone”… to name a few benefits.
But first of all, YOU need to give yourself permission and feel comfortable about making such primal sounds BEFORE the birth and so do the people who you have chosen to support you (even some birth professionals need a reminder that vocalising is important).
If your loved ones aren’t prepared, it could bring up anxiety for them (especially if they are the type who want to ‘fix’ everything – most men are like this, and mothers tend to worry). You don’t want an anxious person supporting you and you also don’t want to be suppressing your sounds just because you don’t want to freak out your loved ones!!!
Remember that you are using your voice as a pain relief and ‘opening up’ tool to help you birth your baby gently into the world!
You really can’t afford to abandon your voice but you CAN prepare your loved ones.
Here are some discussion points and exercises you can do with those loved ones who will most likely be present during your labour. Adjust the language of course, according to whether you are talking to your hubby or children…
Remember that you are using your voice as a pain relief and ‘opening up’ tool to help you birth your baby gently into the world!
Points for discussion:
“I will be making sounds during contractions which will be different to the sounds I normally make. They are good, healthy sounds that are helping me cope with pain and to birth my baby. When these sounds become more intense, it means that the baby is VERY close to being born.”
“It is important to me that you feel comfortable with these sounds so I can let go into the birthing zone using my voice. I need to know that you won’t freak out when I make sounds because I need you to be present with me… NOT busy freaking out. Here are some fun exercises we can do now to help us ALL become uninhibited with using our voice and hearing each other make different sounds. Then when it comes to the birthing day, making sounds won’t be an issue.”
