Recognising – and accounting for – personal triggers has been transformational in my parenting. Taking the time to heal my own wounds means that I can give my children the space they need to express their emotions without my personal bias impacting them.
As any parent knows, we won’t always get it right. Even if you go to the ends of the earth to overcome your triggers, they will still linger, surfacing when you are stretched thinnest.
When we are triggered, our default is to parent in the way that comes most naturally to us, which is to emulate the parenting we were shown as children.
If our own childhood experiences involved authoritative or abusive forms of parenting, these are our darkest moments as parents.
The goal can’t be to parent perfectly 100% of the time, because we are only human. But if we can parent intentionally the majority of the time, we’ll begin to see a generational shift towards responsive parenting becoming the default.
Cayla Solomon is a certified Sleep and Well Being Specialist, a certified parent educator, and a mother of 3. Cayla believes in finding sleep solutions through responsive parenting practices, while building connected relationships. She is passionate about helping families improve sleep without resorting to sleep training. You can find Cayla at @officialsleepingbeauties on Instagram, or at www.sleepingbeauties.ca.
