…the culture that we live in tries to nurture positivity, growth and success, instead of authenticity and sustainability. But without the opportunity to heal through sharing, it can be very hard finding oneself in the mother role.
If we would just be free to discover motherhood from all kinds of angles. Meeting your freshly born little pup might be the key to settling it all into place. But it might as well be only one small step towards getting to know the person who will later become the love of your life.
It is natural taking time to feel good with somebody. It takes an effort to find the right string that can connect two people. Why not give everyone the time they need, even if it’s a mother and her infant? With the right support and empathy each of us can contribute to healthy relationships and to nurturing a generation that feels loved.
I was lucky that I was surrounded by a supportive and understanding family. With their help I made it through those hard sleepless nights and tantrum attacks. And now I am at the point that I whole-heartedly want to shout out: You will get there. Sooner or later you will love your child from all your pores, and you will understand what it means to be a mother. It means ripping off every inch of your inner basement until finding new ways of rebuilding it. To become a deeper, more connected and better person.
And every game you play together, every book you read to them, every word they tell you and you tell them will intensify this connection.
Just trust in both of you, give yourself time, and you’ll become the mother you want to be.
Following the saying “one leg in the gutter, the other one stuck in a fairy tale”, Hanuka Lohrengel, freelance illustrator and social worker living in Latvia, tries to be kind to herself and tries to connect the dots between reality and dream. In her comic series “Dwarfmother’s Den” she invites other parents to find comfort and warmth in her everyday life with a wild and untamed toddler. You can find her at her website www.hanukalohrengel.com, and follow her on Instagram and Facebook.