Speak
Miscarriage is known as the loneliest grief. Speak to your partner, extended family, and friends. Females may own the physical side of miscarriage, but your partner is experiencing the same loss and disappointment that you are. Friends may feel unsure of what to say and what terminology to use “pregnancy” vs “baby”, but push past this and rest your head on any available shoulder.
Let the little comments go
People may say things, unthinking, and not designed to hurt. Try to let these comments wash over you. I carried one midwife’s clumsy sentence “I’m sorry it isn’t the news you were hoping for” with me for a long time. Festering and a burden, do not allow any anger to consume you; let it go.
Moving On
It is important to gain a sense of closure as you recover. Moving forward without this can be as damaging as the experience itself.
Miscarriage fundamentally changed who I am. My physical, emotional and mental health were all deeply affected. I am now choosing to let my experiences empower me to help others. To let you know that you will be OK.
I think of “them “every day and yes, sometimes I cry. Yet I have achieved what I hope you do too.
Acceptance.
Gemma Chatzipanagiotis, wife to Teo and mum to Valentino and Morena (and three angels), has always been a passionate writer and has recently started a blog: https://mummymrs.me/. You can also find her on Facebook and Twitter.
