So how do you still enjoy all the aspects of pregnancy without getting swallowed up by fear?
Here are some tips on how you can keep the level of anxiety and other emotions at a manageable level when you finally fall pregnant after pregnancy loss or infertility.
- Fresh air. Get outside and into nature as much as possible. It will help, I promise.
- GET OFF GOOGLE. If you’re worried about something, check with your doctor. But if you keep googling every time you have a twinge, you will drive yourself crazy. Your body is completely unique to everyone else. This is your pregnancy, and comparing it to other people’s symptoms is only likely to invite more fear into your journey.
- Your fears are normal. Don’t ignore them. The more you ignore them, the louder they will become. Acknowledge them, and write them down. See them and be conscious of them. Are they true, or is this merely a story you’re telling yourself?
- Affirmations – create some affirmations or mantra’s whenever the anxiety or fear comes up. Whatever feels comfortable for you – as long as it doesn’t trigger your bullsh*t button. You need to believe what you’re saying. Try these -
I trust that my baby will know what to do / I am taking one day at a time / I am doing everything in my power to grow a healthy baby / My body is strong and capable / I trust my body and my baby to do the right thing.
- If you’re feeling angry at an insensitive comment or if you see a pregnancy announcement and still get triggered, that’s OK. As soon as you feel the emotion come up, pause. Take 3 deep breaths and imagine your baby growing inside your belly. Feel love and the need to protect your baby. Then when you’re in a calmer state, perhaps before you go to bed that night, grab out your journal and write down exactly why you felt that emotion. Keep asking yourself why. Eventually you may uncover what is really bothering you. Then you can rationalise it and once again develop a counter-affirmation.
- Most importantly, talk to someone about your fears and level of anxiety. As they say, a problem shared is a problem halved. It is important to know your audience however. Your friend who is still struggling to fall pregnant may have a hard time supporting you.
Having a normal amount of anxiety during your pregnancy after miscarriage / pregnancy loss or after trying to conceive for so long is expected.
But you don’t have to live there or be consumed by it.
You deserve to be happy and to have a beautiful pregnancy experience.
Are you pregnant and in need of support?
On 1 March, the doors will open to a new group support program for women who are pregnant after infertility and loss. Your Pregnancy Haven is a safe space where you can share, learn and connect with others who are on their pregnancy journey.
Join us LIVE every week for group coaching and support. Hear from experts. Learn tips on how to decrease your anxiety. Chat with others, ask questions and receive support 24/7 in our private community. Participate in group challenges to keep you inspired, focused and on-track to hold your baby in your arms.
You don’t have to travel this path alone.
For more information and to join our community, visit www.jenniferrobertson.co/your-pregnancy-haven.
Jennifer Robertson is a fertility coach and has helped women all over the world transform their mindset and take back control of their life in the midst of infertility.
She is also author of The Injustice of Infertility, a deeply inspiring and raw account of her own seven-year fertility journey.
Throughout her own fertility journey, Jen discovered that her old ways of pushing and working hard weren’t serving her. She is now using the lessons learned along the way to develop programs and support women throughout their journey to motherhood – from the moment they start trying to conceive, until they hold their baby in their arms.
