This could not be further from the truth. The room was filled with women casting warm glances towards each other and offering words of support and encouragement that the choices each mother was making were the right ones for their family. No judgement. Only kind words, and some gentle advice offered when asked.
Had I believed the myth of the “Mummy Wars”, I would have robbed myself of so much. My children too.
I had heard the phrase “it takes a village to raise a child,” but I could not comprehend even a little what this meant until I had a village of my own.
The comfort of shared experiences and having someone who understands, who REALLY understands, the ups and downs of motherhood in a way only another mum at the same life stage as you can understand, that is something I simply cannot measure.
The addition of those mothers to the lives of myself and my family has brought me so much joy. I’ve always been lucky enough to be surrounded by extraordinary women. My journey into motherhood has been no exception. My tribe, my little village, is filled with the most extraordinary women. Some are family by blood, others “only” by love. Most are nearby, some offer support from afar.
We share a lot, these extraordinary women and I.
They see me at my best, and my worst. They celebrate my success, as I celebrate theirs. We cry together through the hard times and laugh together at the ridiculousness that motherhood often brings.
These extraordinary women reassure me when I’m scared. They bring me coffee and hope when exhaustion threatens. They love my children with a fierceness usually reserved for immediate family. One of these extraordinary women even helped welcome my son into the world. These extraordinary women are my heroes. Between all the joy and obligation that motherhood brings, they create space for me, to share my truth without fear of judgment.
Don’t believe the hype. Shout your joys, your fears and your failures to the world. Look for the ones that answer “me too”. It might be only a whisper, but they are there. They are your people. Hold on to them.
Originally published here.
Haylee Hackenberg is a children’s author, a pre-service teacher and a mama to two. Striving for gentle, respectful parenting, she shares on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter.
