3. Special Objects
The reality is, we often don’t have much choice but to leave, even if our little one doesn’t really want us to. Sometimes we have to get to work or an appointment and just can’t hang around! This is where having something special your child can keep with them at the carers can come in very handy! Something special from you that they can turn to for comfort and to let them know you are connected even when you can’t physically be together. It could be a bracelet they wear or a small item they are safe to have in their pocket. They might even bring a special toy, stuffed animal, blanket or ‘lovey’ with them for added comfort (but check with the provider before promising this). Show your child that you have something special to remind you of them, too.
4. Talk it out
Talk with them about being away from each other when you are at home. Ask them how they are feeling if they are old enough to talk about it. Validate their feelings if they are sad or clingy when you leave (or return!). It’s important your little one knows all of their feelings matter, and that you understand their struggles. And even if they don’t have many words just yet, it can still help them process this new part of life if you talk through it for them!
5. Handle your own feelings
Often, our toddlers aren’t the only ones having a hard time transitioning to being apart! YOU need to feel confident with the transition if your little one is going to. Are you feeling resentful, anxious, guilty, sad, confused? It’s important to honour whatever your feelings are and be compassionate with yourself. It’s ok that this is a difficult time, whatever your reasons and no matter what your feelings are. Talk things through with your significant other, a trusted friend, or your care provider so that your feelings aren’t getting in the way and causing more problems.
I’d love to know what YOU have found helpful during this transition! Share your tips below.
Anne Cullen is passionate about supporting and educating women in the early years of their mothering journey so that they can truly enjoy parenting and their babies grow up feeling safe and understood. She uses her broad range of knowledge and experience in responsive parenting and well-being to guide mothers to a place of feeling confident and empowered. Anne has a Bachelor of Arts degree with majors in Sociology/Anthropology; Family Resources; and Education and is an Advanced MAP Practitioner and an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant. She has worked with families and children for over 25 years in various roles around the United States and New Zealand where she currently resides with her husband and two beautiful boys.
