By Rebecca Eadie
We have done Secret Santa in our family ever since us ‘kids’ were old enough to drive ourselves to the shops and pick out the gift. It has been a tradition among the adults every year, and everyone enjoys putting time and thought into one meaningful gift rather than scrambling at the shops to buy something for everyone.
Fast forward a couple of decades and now amongst us we have five children under 7 years, and Christmas has become a total gift giving bonanza! Last Christmas, after opening their presents from Santa, the kids received gifts from parents, grandparents and all the aunts and uncles. Of course, they were happy and grateful, but does the joy of Christmas really increase per gift?
When my sister suggested we do Christmas differently this year by introducing the children’s Secret Santa, I wondered why we hadn’t thought about it before. The idea is simple: instead of just receiving gifts from everyone in the family, the kids each buy a present for one other child. Not only does each family have a few less presents to buy, but the children get to enjoy planning and picking a special present for one of their cousins.
When my sister suggested we do Christmas differently this year by introducing the children’s Secret Santa, I wondered why we hadn’t thought about it before.
Initially, I thought it would simply be convenient and time saving, but since talking to my 6-year-old son about the kids’ Secret Santa, I have loved seeing his excitement and joy in picking the perfect gift for his 1-year-old cousin and anticipate with excitement who might be buying for him
It really warmed my heart. He wanted to know her interests and favourite colours, and what might be safe and good for her to play with. The mental load of finding gifts for the whole family seems a lot less of a burden when your children want to actively participate, and you can (inadvertently) teach them about gratitude and the deeper emotional connection to the act of giving. Not to mention the decreased mental clutter and appreciating the simplicity in not having too many ‘things’.
Doing things a bit differently has already brought a new perspective to our Christmas this year.
I spoke with some friends about our kids’ Secret Santa. I wondered if it was quite typical and maybe many families already do Christmas this way? While no one had done it exactly that way, there were some interesting ideas and iterations that got us all thinking about making Christmas more meaningful for our kids and each other. There were so many great ideas, like a ‘non gift Christmas’ where everyone gives what they can thoughtfully to another; for example, a night of babysitting, a homemade freezer meal, help with a utility bill, help with the gardening or cleaning.
Doing things a bit differently has already brought a new perspective to our Christmas this year. Even though the kids’ Secret Santa might not suit all stages and ages, just by opening the conversation to friends, I’ve got some great ideas for the future too! If you find Christmas overwhelming and financially stressful, why not reach out to your loved ones and find a new way of doing things, create new traditions and you never know the flow-on effects of having a more mindful festive season.
Bec Eadie is a Midwife, Calmbirth Educator and Prenatal Yoga Instructor. For more parenting, pregnancy and birth related articles see her Birthing Energy website blog. You can also connect with her on Facebook and Instagram.
