Why do you feel angry at your friend when they fall pregnant?
When we want something so bad, it hurts to see others getting it, and not us. We go down that rabbit hole and assume that they have such a perfect life because they have what we want. And it makes us angry. Why is it so easy for them? Why is it so hard for us? It’s not fair. We want to blame someone. And it creates a separation between us. And when this happens, the pain and sadness turn to anger.
It’s so easy to look from the outside and assume that things are easy for everyone else however.
The truth is that everyone has their own version of hard. This is yours.
And what appears to be easy on the outside can in fact be untrue. Just as you’re hiding your pain from others, they may be doing the same.
Comparing your journey to anyone else’s is a recipe for disaster. Keep your eyes on the road in front of you and your hands on the steering wheel. When you start looking at the lane across from you, you risk crashing your car. We all begin and end our life at different times. This is not a race. We all have a different path, and this is yours.
What can you do to make things a little easier?
Make sure you’re taking care of yourself. You can’t be brave if you’re tired. And infertility requires a level of bravery unparalleled to anything I have ever experienced in my life.
Stop putting your life on hold. When you invest everything into trying to conceive – you take the supplements, you do the acupuncture, massage, diets and don’t get the outcome you were hoping for, you end up feeling resentful. It is important to keep your life going at the same time.
I’ve also developed a Pregnancy Announcement Survival Guide to pull you out of the downward spiral before it takes hold, and allow you to see a pregnancy announcement and feel happy for your friends. You can receive your free copy by subscribing at www.yourfertilityhaven.com.
Jennifer Robertson is a Fertility Coach. She helps women deal with the emotional ups and downs of being on the fertility rollercoaster by teaching them ways to conceive quicker and not only survive, but come out the end stronger and more empowered. Jennifer is a proud mum of two gorgeous children we were the result of an epic 7-year fertility journey which included IVF, Surrogacy, Miscarriages and a surprise natural pregnancy added for good measure. She is writing a book on her journey and has created a support group called Your Fertility Haven, designed to provide other women who are having difficulty conceiving with a judgement free and supportive space to connect with and learn from each other.