You didn’t see how scared I was. The way I held my breath, only exhaling as you took your first.
How even now you’re grown I’m still scared for you. Still holding my breath not knowing if this feeling ever truly goes away.
But I’ll always be your biggest supporter. Pushing you towards greatness even if it scares me half to death.
You don’t see the panic that grips my soul in the still of the night. Fear of the unknown, worry for your future and angst over whether I’m getting any of this right.
But still I rise each morning, hold you close, breathe you in and put one foot in front of the other.
And I’ll continue to do so.
Until it’s your turn,
To experience all that parenthood entails.
And when that day comes,
You won’t see me,
I’ll be there quietly in the background,
As I’ve always been.
Your biggest supporter,
With tears in my eyes,
Still holding my breath,
Loving you through it all.
Lacey Owen is a busy mum of three gorgeous children who provide the basis of her blog @Laced with Love. Experiences along her journey to becoming a mother and all that motherhood entails such as miscarriage, ill babies, secondary infertility and raising young children. She works part time as a health professional and loves nothing more than creating memories with her young family at many beaches in the winterless north of NZ.
