One of the many things I have to be grateful for is that I’ve never had a shortage of motherly love.
Love that eclipsed any fights and disagreements. Love that transcended thousands of miles that lay between us over the past decade. Love that shown bright despite most of our interaction being mediated by electronic impulses of the internet. Love that continues to be my source of strength, my reassurance at times of self-doubt, and the foundation upon which I build my own family.
I think it’s more than what most people have and I’m eternally thankful. And no matter what happens, I will always have that. I know there is so much love, the reserve will never run dry.
All things come to an end, the good and the bad, and only love is immortal.
And this is what I want to pass on to my daughter. To give her as much love as I can fit into any one moment. So she never has to doubt being loved. So that if ever I’m unable to be near, she has a surplus she can run on for many, many years. And if 20-30 years down the track my relationship with her is anything like the one I share with my mum, I will consider it my greatest success.
But for now, surviving a day at a time is all we can really do. Sadly, the limits of our control don’t extend beyond the edge of today.
That’s why I will hold my girl, and try to be grateful for the thick and thin. And I will pray for my mum, and I will pray for me, and I will pray for the other parents who have the same hopes and fears and who love their children just as intensely.
Alla Zaykova is a communications professional, a working mum and a storyteller with a newfound passion – gentle parenting. She lives in Wellington, New Zealand, with her husband and daughter. You can read more from Alla over at her website Midnight Mommy Stories.
