Have child-free visits
If her children’s behaviour affects your own children or causes too much stress for you, then schedule mainly adults-only social events.
What not to do:
Don’t parent other people’s children
Allow your friend to deal with her children’s behaviour (or not deal with it, as the case may be). Get involved only when something involves your children or your property.
Don’t think you can change other people
Don’t expend energy thinking you can change your friend’s family life with a few well-placed comments. Forcing change on others can make them hurt, angry or defensive. Furthermore, unless she asks for help, she may be content with things as they are in her family.
Don’t stop seeing your friend
Friendships are precious and important to your health and happiness. Children eventually mature and grow up, and you won’t be around her children as much as they get older. Find ways to make this situation work for you.
Elizabeth Pantley is a mother of four, grandmother, and author of the bestselling book, The No-Cry Sleep Solution, plus 8 other books in the No-Cry Solution Series which helps mums and dads through all key stages of parenting. Visit her on her website, blog, Instagram or Pinterest.
