In my third trimester, I started to get nervous about having the routine blood pressure readings that are done at check-ups with Amber, and it created a self-fulfilling situation. My nerves at having the blood pressure taken meant that my blood pressure would temporarily spike. High blood pressure is a serious thing in pregnancy and Amber walked a professional line of keeping me and my unborn daughter safe, yet understanding the situation and looking for ways that I could still have the birth I wanted.
She knew me, she knew my history, my personality, my husband, our dynamic together.
That understanding of all of me, not just a set of numbers produced in a one-off visit, meant she was able to offer me much greater care. My experiences with hospital obstetricians were quite different. I felt talked down to and belittled for not sharing their view on what was best for me and my baby, based on their quick assessment of numbers.
Ultimately, in the battle between nerves versus labour starting naturally, nerves won and my labour was chemically induced when I was 10 days past my due date. Although I had not wanted to birth in a hospital with drugs in my system and confined a lot to the bed due to the monitoring equipment, once we got going it was as I’d always imagined. Myself, my husband and Amber. A tight team who trusted each other, based on months of planning together for this day.
Amber continued to come visit us at home for 5 weeks after the birth. I called her at 9pm on a Saturday night, the first night we were home with my daughter, when my daughter started vomiting blood. My husband called her one weekend when we thought I had mastitis. My husband was almost in tears of relief when Amber correctly diagnosed that I did not have mastitis.
Midwives are not only caring for pregnant and labouring women, they are supporting families through the most significant months of their lives.
When Amber signed my daughter and I off from her care, I gave Amber a thank you card. I had wanted to get her something more, but I had managed to get out to a shop and get a card, and that was an achievement. In a way, nothing I could buy could accurately express what I wanted to say – thank you for bringing safety to me, the most precious thing in my whole world.
New Zealand is an amazing model of care, by offering mothers free access to community midwifery care. What other services can you have someone come to your house, be on call day and night for months, and still not have to pay anything for it? Community midwives provide great outcomes for mothers, fathers and babies, and better outcomes for families means better outcomes for us all. #backmidwives and show your support by signing the petition from the New Zealand College of Midwives, calling for more support for midwives in our community.
Freya lives in Auckland with her partner and young daughter. She writes about her life experiences, particularly her early parenting experiences, on her website. She enjoys getting out for walks and outdoor adventures with her family.
